Night to Remember.

It was 7^th of June, when my better–half left for her official outing to Bangkok. I was compelled to be an acting mother to my little baby girl. 

Initially, I was bit worried about how shall I keep her happy, and my other worry was to manage her in the night–board.  Perhaps, with finger crossed I hate night approaching. I wish night to be the shortest or else no night at all. 

During the day, I can make her happy and laze her in many ways by taking her outside in the sun and in the rain. I can take her to drive and buy her favorite chips. With all these thoughts first night have approached sooner than expected, but wasn't troublesome as anticipated. She slept peacefully with occasional break through. But I have doped her with some milk and with her favorite nursery rhymes.  

For young kids, I know what it is to be without a mother. First few nights was completely a heart pinching nights for three of us? When she cried, I felt the weight of thousand nailing over my head both physically and mentally. It is not as easy as you see to manage, handle and understand innocent kids. They don't understand your feelings and vice versa.   

Few years back I used get annoyed with neighbor's child nagging and crying needlessly. Now I am married, and had my own baby. I feel the difference. I started to love kids. I finally realized every kids are perfectly same despite caste and creed, rich and poor, so treat them same.

I have one of my blonde–faced cousin who hate kids more than anyone. I saw him throwing pots and pans to his brother's kids few years back. He got married past some years. He now have two beautiful babies. Perhaps, he became world–class father. Now he does all kinds of baby keeping –he cooks for them and happily put them into sleep.

My little baby girl is a very peaceful girl. She hardly cry and nags. Occluded within her body is her damnless face. But she is such a loving girl. You all would love to hold her. 

But for past few days, I observed some change in her. She became more serious. She became the new boss. Although, I am experiencing quite unhealthy nights but I am also equally learning so many lessons from her as a parent and a father.

One strange thing is that, I have to repeatedly play her nursery rhymes even in the late mid–night and early morning. I am afraid what my neighbors or passerby may think of me. These days my room was completely flooded with the repeated rhymes sounds –'daddy fingers, heads and shoulders, and baa baa black sheep, etc...' Such odd hour's culture is something very strange for newlywed’s couple.   

My worries is not only to put her into sleep but also her sickness in her mom's absence. I always pray for her good health and sound sleep. Indeed nothing have worried me like this before.   

Nothing has come to me as hard as this moment. I have to do everything to make her happy, –I often have to walk like a cat, sing her song like a superstar and have to dance in the middle of the night. I fear how my father would have duped me into sleep during those days when light and nursery rhymes were absolutely rare. 

Although, with time and space everything have settled so well, but I am much worried about her emotional growth and emotional detachment. One good thing I have learnt from this moment is that she taught me to be more patient, funny and serious. 

I don't understand how some mothers can leave their child to be with another man. I also wonder how some well–educated parents can abandoned their baby to go abroad. With week–long practical on experience, I give up the idea of Australia Dream completely if I have to leave my baby girl behind. 

I say undeniably NO to Australia journey until my girl turn five or six or not at ALL!